DINO To be honest Doc, I’ve got a huge
problem, I think I’m Dean Martin.
DEES Dean Martin?
DINO You know the other day, I don’t
know why but the Mayor of Beverly
Hills put up two signs on my block,
Crawl and Don’t crawl. I knew right
away something was wrong.
DEESWell do you drink a lot?
DINO Not really I put my favorite drink
in the freezer, and after a few
hours I eat it like a Popsicle.
DEES What does your wife think about
your problem being Dean Martin.
DINOWe had breakfast this morning she
gave me the silent treatment. We
didn’t speak a single word, it’s
all my son’s fault, he wasn’t
holding the cue cards high enough.
DEES Do you like being married?
DINO I love being married but I’m not a
fanatic about it.
DEES You must have a loving wife?
DINO
You know what it means when you
come home when there’s someone
there to meet you with a hug, a
kiss and a kind word, it means your
in the wrong house.
DEES Seems like you have a lot of
problems being Dean Martin how do
you sleep at night.
DINO Well the other night I didn’t get
any sleep, I woke up in the middle
of the night and felt something
pretty hard under my pillow, the
sidewalk.
DEES Do you have any idea what time it
was?
DINO You know Doc, I didn’t know what
time it was I drank my watch.
DEES Care to talk about any other
problems?
DINO Yea, I saw my heart doctor the
other day, I had a real bad chest
cold. I told him I was having the
chills, so he put me in a room with
a woman that was having hot
flashes.
DEES I’m sure you love your wife and she
loves you. Do you treat her well?
DINO Sure I do, the other day she asked
me to look at some furs, so I took
her to the Zoo.
DEES Well let’s keep working on this
problem. Your pal Dean Martin seems
to have taken over you life.
DINO Welcome to my world Doc.
DEES Well let’s keep these meetings as
often as possible, I know I can
help you.
DINO Right Doc. You know, something in
my heart keeps sayin, My some place
is here.
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